Canada: The Good, The Bad, And The Dirty

Named after one of my favorite songs on Death Of A Bachelor by Panic! At The Disco.

Since I can’t tell you about everything about Canada, I decided to compose a list of the ‘mosts’ on my trip. So here we go!

Most Interesting:

My aunt Bess was leaving go somewhere and my mother, needing her for something, asked me where she was. I told she was heading towards the bus station. My mother paled, gave me money, and told me to run after her. I stared her thinking how insane that would be because I was going to run over something. However, some type of Usain Bolt ignited in me and I ran past the whole small shopping complex which people staring at me like, “What is she running for?” 

Eventually, I caught up with Aunt Bess and gave her the money but going back, I felt drained and could have just fainted there.

Most Scary:

The first time the generator that we used to power the house went out. I was just playing Plants vs Zombies 2 when practically everything went dark. We then had to use the candles we had brought with us from Georgia until Flynn fixed it.

Most Fun:

Swinging on a tire swing near the the frozen lake with Ophelia while just talking.

Most Weird:

Every time I had to watch Harper over-flatter Barden & Flynn. Calm yourself.

Most Strange:

Well, this is kind of strange for myself, but everyone depended on me to know how to cook and make them food. I might be a southern, but let me tell you, if I’m already clumsy in everything else I can possibly do, how could I possibly cook anything without screwing it up. The older Opal eventually figured it out.

Most Embarrassing:

I think the most embarrassing moment was when one of my dad’s old friends came along and was speaking to me but I couldn’t understand some of what he was saying because he had a strange accent. So this one time I guessed he was trying to say, “Chickens in the cheap laboratory over seas.”

He was actually saying, “Can you reach the chips in that pantry for me?”

Yeah, I don’t know either.

And everyone laughed at me.

Most Awkward:

When one (of the plethora) of the girls from the lodge came to the frozen lake with one of Flynn’s band of cronies, basically made out and Azalea was like 10 feet away playing with one of our other cousins, Zinnia.


Most Annoying:

The whole car ride from the airport. Swamp and Begonia wouldn’t stop fighting over a charger and Azalea kept singing an extremely obnoxious song while I sat there, wanting to bang my head against something and I’m pretty sure Aunt Bess and Uncle Felix felt the same.

Meanwhile, I think my parents were using the earplugs from the plane…

Most Repetitive:

Fletcher asking Ophelia, Daniel, Allison, and Barden the most stereotypical questions or statements about Canada. Such as: “Do you guys know what summer is?”, “People don’t always put maple syrup on their pancakes in America.”, “If y’all want a popsicle, do you y’all just lick lakes with flavoring added?”

I am so sorry Canadian bloggers that you had to even read that.

Most Sad:

Going to the grouping to make up for Grandpa’s funeral. ;-;

Most Aggravating:

Every dang time Flynn and his friends thought they were so much better than me and take advantage of me like they had done to Harper. And as much as I’m “supposed” to love her, I’m not even half as dense nor valueless like her.

Physical attractivity means nothing, especially if it concerns my cousins. -_-

Most Gross:

So on the drive to New York, we had went past New Jersey. Billboards in New Jersey are what permanently killed my innocence. Not all of them. But some.

If you are innocent, you might not want to look at New Jerseyan billboards. Just a heads-up.

But you know the thing was, even though I was so far from home, one thing stuck in my mind the whole time.

I miss home, I miss the homey exposure, I miss my friends, and there’s one person I miss most of all. Arco. I don’t know why. God, I feel like an idiot. I would hit myself several times with the nearest pillow, but that never seemed to get his laugh or his smile or his face out of my mind. I had a problem, a major one.

Float In The Cyber Space.


2 thoughts on “Canada: The Good, The Bad, And The Dirty

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