Sadie Hawkins Low Down

Okay, so in my recent posts I keep mentioning Sadie Hawkins and some people are like:

“lmao who’s Sadie and why are all the girls going over to her place?”

That’s when I realized not everyone knows what it is. So I took it upon myself to explain it myself as awkwardly as I always do with some research as well as what I’ve been told.

Sadie Hawkins is a character from an old comic. So she was considered pretty… ugly and was really distraught over not having any suitors even by age 35. Her father was also concerned so he was like, “Yo, all of you unmarried men should come to what I’m calling Sadie Hawkins Day.” So there came about some footrace and whoever lost the race had to marry Sadie. She really liked this Adam guy who was already with this chick, Theresa whose father is a big shot potato farmer and a bunch of guys like her, by courtship. But since they weren’t engaged, he was made to attend. Basically, the guy she really liked was in the top ten, like #4 I think, and she got this random guy named John Jonston. Then all of the town’s spinsters were like, “Hey… this HAS to be annual.” All the guys were like., “Oh geez…”

And so yeah. SADIE HAWKINS.

That explanation was kind of strange, I got ‘Drunk History of Fall Out Boy’ vibes.

So the dance, based on this, is a girls ask guys type of shebang. It’s apparently a spring dance, which I think is strange considering that’s prom season? But whatever, I’m not in StudCo (Student Council).

If I even go, I’ll most likely need a new dress. My homecoming dress would have been perfect for the spring season because it was floral but I didn’t know about Sadie’s so I didn’t want to leave it there and not wear it once.

The reason I say if I even go is because a) I kind of don’t want to go anyways and b) I kind of want to ask this guy I like but don’t because there will be some consequences I don’t want to deal with.

My next post will cover that and yes, January, I honestly tried for one post a week but my laptop is now broken and WordPress App sucks but I’ll try for you guys until I get a new laptop.

Float In The Cyber Space!

When A Business Is Your Match Maker

On Friday, during 4th period advisement and after my first SAT Vocabulary word quiz, we were given two different surveys. The idea somewhat stressed me, not because the SAT word quiz was hard, but because I’ve had quizzes back to back almost every period. And I also thought it was one of those student surveys. You know them, the ones that you never want to take but then have to anyways and it makes you want to choose “Strongly Disagree” every question. Yeah, those.

The first one was mandatory and isn’t very important to the post… but I’ll talk about it anyways. It was from Boy Scouts Of America and apparently they need it for numbers?

Anyways, it was a basic one asking about jobs and hobbies when I realize… I had to do the same one in like 8th grade. And once again, these hobbies did not have reading or writing but rather… historical reenactments and clock making. HISTORICAL REENACTMENTS. BUT NO READING AND WRITING???

Before I get even more triggered, let’s move on to the main focus of this post. 

The second one was voluntary but intriguing. It was from this club from school called SADD or Students Against Destructive Decisions. So it’s a survey asking you questions about your personality and hobbies, your name and grade. Once you turn it in the SADD club sends it to a company and you get your top 10 matches with guys in your grade for 2 dollars. And the results come around Valentine’s Day (MY NEW CRUSH’S BIRTHDAY AHHH (well he’s been my crush for 6 months but yeah)

At first, I was like this is ridiculous but the more I looked, the more I thought about it. THIS COULD BE MY CURE TO LONELINESS. I mean lmao, I’m ugly af but I mean, still. And wouldn’t it be great if my crush matched up? The curiosity was killing me so I went,”What the hell?” 

My crush actually has similar answers to me so here’s to hoping. maybe I might actually ask him to Sadie Hawkins. Just kidding lol, I have ZERO CONFIDENCE.

Float In The Cyber Space!

Bipolar Ass Weather

Okay, so I live in the south in a state called Georgia. So we aren’t the coldest place on earth but I mean it’s January. January is supposed to be chilly, maybe some snow, right?

Wrong.

You see, the weather in this state is completely wack. The strangest events will be happening in the wrong months. So this year, it being January, two weeks it was hella cold and was rumored to snow. (It hasn’t snowed in like 3 years, so it was wishful thinking.) It even snowed in TEXAS. BUT NOT HERE.
But now this week, it’s like summer. As of right now, it is 78 FUCKING DEGREES. WHAT THE FUCK?!

Guess it is a great time for spring sports like track and lacrosse…

there’s not such thing as winter here, end of story.

It’s called fighting season instead at my high school because SHIT HAS GONE DOWN. Last week, there were 12 fights, one of which was between two freshman because one poured milk on the other one’s hair and apparently she just got it done and so basically… there was blood and hair ripped out. 

Plus, two of my best friends I made this year got in a fight (not a physical one [well, technically].) but it’s just kind of sensitive and awkward for everyone right now. And what else is striking is because the day it happened was Friday the 13th and THE LAST 20 minutes of school. It was a good day for everyone until then. (This was basically discussion in one of the posts that should have posted but this is just a summation.)

(You know I was trying to write this post by using “this friend” and “that friend” but it’s way too confusing and I don’t want to use their actual names something like this so code names! And this might continue in other posts, I’m not sure.) 

Basically what happened is that we were doing something in AP Biology. It was a team type thing and so my friend, (let’s do flowers because I can’t think) Daisy, had to run to get paper with a DNA sequence and make into mRNA, I sit down and translate it into tRNA and then my other friend, Poppy, goes and finds the matching sequence. It’s not really relevant but I thought it was fun.

The other person, Dahlia, involved in the fight was also a searcher for another group. And it bothers me because Dahlia and Poppy that so these two friends were talking and Poppy and playfully patted one of them on the shoulder. Dahlia thought it was a slap (someone told me they saw and it was an obvious pat) and then punched Poppy in the face.

 So yeah.

(Also, I’m aware that my posts didn’t post last week so starting now, I’ll post every day for a week to make up for it. 🙂 )

Float In The Cyber Space!

Loss Of Christmas Spirit

So it’s winter break and everyone’s hyped because no school, no finals, NO PROBLEMS. And hey, Christmas is here and gifts are lit! I even went to a Christmas gathering that was very enjoyable. There were happy holidays vibes all around.

So… Why wasn’t I also in the cheer?

I AM a naturally cynical pessimist but even I can’t deny the holiday cheer. Usually. But this year just didn’t do it for me at all. As a person who has family who fight constantly and can’t stand each other, I usually lean on my friends for spirit.

Maybe it was because 2016 was a generally bad year. A lot of things went down globally that made me very upset and disappointed with not only the state of my country… but the world. Seeing racism and bigotry along xenophobia and homophobia arise among us. Perhaps it was the terrorism. That probably combined with the watching of several of my role models pass.

Maybe it was the fact that my family was even in more ruin than past years and my friendships are… not so hot. After losing a lot more relatives, my mother stopped talking to anyone for a week. Additionally, relations with my siblings has not gotten any better with more and more fighting and screaming to the point most of my time is spent away from my family rather with them. This is why I spend most time in my room or out of the house. But there’s always new problems within my friend problems and everyone expects me to automatically fix them.

Or maybe it was the fact that I couldn’t really feel. Except for bouts of some emotions (plus feeling sorry for myself), I didn’t really… feel? I don’t know if that makes any sense.

It was probably a mix of all of these. But in this year of 2017, I hope for the better. 

Float In The Festive Cyber Space!

2017 Resolutions

So as I was at one of my friend’s New Years Party, loading up on chocolate and drinking cold cider in freezing rain while randomly calling people while playing Bingo and Truth or Dare and setting fireworks and a bonfire under a canopy…

You know, as normal people with their New Year’s. Totally normal people. Especially teenagers who are looked upon as smart by their peers… you know that makes more sense.

Anyway, during that chaos, I started to think about what my 2017 resolutions should be. To be honest, I gave the horror of the year that shall be named so much that I hadn’t had time to think to the future. I’ll be 16 this time which is SUPER crazy to think about because one of you have been journeying with me on this ride of teenhood since the beginning. Yikes.

In this post, I will be using… DIVIDERS! okay look, I know it isn’t that great but I’ve never used them before (probably should) and yeah.

download-8

Blogging

  • Try to post at least once or twice a week (every day right now is just… impossible).
  • Add some more variety to my posts(more sarcastic commentaries, or literary skits, stuff like that).
  • Keep this blog more updated on life in general.
  • Changing up the design of this blog (it’s been years…).
  • Branch out and meet more new bloggers.
  • Socialize with y’all more!
  • Add more photography on this blog.
  • Catch up with people because my reader was dysfunctional for most of 2016.
  • Post important events more promptly than waiting months to post… yikes.

download-8Academics

  • Work hard to maintain my GPA.
  • Stop procrastinating as much with AP work because it causes last night stress.
  • Continue attending study groups on Saturdays and even suggest inviting more people.
  • Actually continuously organize my backpack.
  • Join another club?? Or maybe just increase my involvement in one I’m in already.
  • Get those 40 hours of volunteering for that cord before March for that cord.
  • Read your AP study books more often.
  • (This is more of something I HAVE TO DO SOON). SIGN. UP. FOR. THE. AP. EXAMS.

download-8Social

  • Open yourself to meeting new people and making new friends.
  • Try to be more trusting of people.
  • Maybe hang out with friends more instead of avoiding invites.
  • Work on the social anxiety some.
  • Talk more instead of sitting in a corner and eating most of the time? (this will be hard af)

download-8

 

Personal

  • Redecorate or rearrange my room.
  • Get in more exercise instead of being a bed potato all time.
  • Ironically enough after that one, catch up on all of my shows I haven’t watched in forever.
  • Start writing stories again or at least shake up from poems.
  • READ. MORE. BOOKS. Book club is helping but honestly ever since I started Freshman year, I have only been reading books I absolutely have to.
  • Wake up and watch the sunrise!
  • Expand my music ranges.
  • Make edits for my tumblr blog on more of a schedule.
  • Have better time management (the planner is helping)
  • Save up money rather spending it on temporary things.
  • Improve my viola playing skills, finish learning piano, and pick up guitar.
  • Learn to make more decisions rather indecisive all the time.
  • Draw more and use that watercolor kit I’ve have forever.
  • Write music because it seems fun af.
  • Start video gaming more… (this only thing keeping me from playing video games is my brother who is attached to our new PS4.)download-8

I think the main lesson I learned from 2016 was: Sometimes you have to let go, it’s never easy, but it eventually works out.

Something useful from something so… awful.

Float In The Cyber Space!

2016 Overview

Look, I’m not the first, …and totally not the last, to admit that the year that we call 2016 (aka Satan) was pretty bad. Not even going to cover it up with some optimistic stuff. 

Nope.

And this year, you guys saw a lot less of me being busy basically all year round, so join me on my 2016 overview on events relevant to me. And by that I mean they are like so… unimportant.

  • Went to Canada
  • Climbed Stone Mountain a few times
  • Survived climbing Stone Mountain on the same day as a major KKK rally
  • Started to work on a poetry collection
  • Graduated middle school
  • Got into, and suffered for the summer, because of AP Biology and AP Human
  • Had to let go of a few things and people
  • Completed a course I need for my permit 
  • Became a high school freshman
  • Started a Tumblr
  • Joined a few clubs (so I wasn’t entirely antisocial)
  • Was apart of solo and ensemble (and didn’t entirely suck despite the fact I was 45 MINUTES LATE)
  • Made friends with some upperclassmen 
  • Starting volunteering for the cord at graduation 
  • Went to my first homecoming ( and gnimocemoh) and helped decorate it
  • 🙃🙃🙃🙃 the fucking election to top elections in disappointment 
  • My 15th birthday passed!
  • Got over my crush of two years… and then has another one (I sure move on quick)
  • Survived the first semester of my freshman year
  • Was invited to a few parties???
  • Pass all my classes with natural A’s
  • JUST GOT MY INSTRUCTIONAL PERMIT AH
  • manage to still be a lame excuse of a human being 
  • Had a mental breakdown each time an influential celebrity died( CAN WE ALL TAKE A SECOND AND ACKNOWLEDGE THE FACT THAT GEORGE MICHAEL, CARRIE FISHER, AND DEBBIE REYNOLDS, DIED WITH IN THREE FUCKING DAYS… fuck this year) 

It’s not much but… It’s just what went down.

Feel free to do this as well.  See y’all on the flip side (2017).

Float In The Cyber Space!

Redoing/Reacting An Old Tag

Alright, I saw Lish do this, so I figured why the hell not? Some opinions and other things have changed as I’ve gone through life and matured but with controversial topics, please… no fighting in the comments.

Bold: 2014 Normal: 2016

1) Skipped class? Nope, I love school.

Still haven’t and I do like school, just not “love” it anymore.

2) Done Drugs? Does medical count? If not, no.

Nope. And since this is a reaction as well, let me add a commentary.

Ever since I entered high school, I’ve become more aware of problems and issues among my friends which had turned to not wise ideas… and we’re underage. I have two friends who drink because their parents don’t care, another friend who got depressed and started smoking, and another who started weed. And some of this was happening behind closed doors prior to high school.

In no shape or way or form do I support this or condone and have constantly voiced against this. This and UNDERAGE NO LESS, is okay.

3) Self Harmed? No, I actually think it’s horrible for that to happen.

I haven’t.

4) Drank? It’s illegal for me to drink, I’m 13.

Not even a sip.

5) Shoplifted? I never plan on it.

Never.

6) Got a tattoo? Nah, I also never plan on it.

Nope and won’t because I’m a pansy.

7) Broken up with someone? No, I’ve never had a relationship.

Never been in a relationship.

WHATS YOUR FAVORITE:

8) Show? Pretty Little Liars.

Daria, (yes I know it’s from the 90’s but its LIT)

….

Fine, a current one: The Big Bang Theory

9) Movie? Lucy.

Mean Girls

10) Song? Middle Of Starting Over by Sabrina Carpenter (For the plot of the new year!)

The (After) Life Of The Party ~ Fall Out Boy

11) Tumblr blog? I’m thinking of getting one but I don’t think I will.

#ShamelessSelfPromotion !!!!!!!!!!

main: carcrashheartbreaks.tumblr.com

(I make edits, talk bands and memes.)

side: alternativesceneconfessions.tumblr.com

12) Singer/Band? The Beatles, Taylor Swift, Selena Gomez, Whitney Houston, Demi Lovato, Avril Lavigne, Echosmith, The Rolling Stones, Sabrina Carpenter, and Queen

HAHAHAHAHA, LOL I BECAME EMO AND ALTERNATIVE, LET’S GO.

Fall Out Boy, Panic! At The Disco, My Chemical Romance, twenty one pilots, Paramore, All Time Low, Best Coast, Halsey, Melanie Martinez, Marina And The Diamonds, AURORA, Ryn Weaver, Zella Day, BORNS, Betty Who, POWERS, Lorde, Wet, MS MR, MisterWives, HOLYCHILD, Broods, HAERTS, Alina Baraz, NONONO, Alison Wonderland, Kat Dahlia, Tove Styrke, WE ARE TWIN, Tori Kelly, Bebe Rexha, Laura Welsh, Charli XCX, Kitten, ZZ Ward, ASTR, Years & Years, Kate Nash, Sky Ferriera, Bastille, LP, Alvvays, Imagine Dragons, Death Cab For Cutie, Night Terrors of 1927, Elizaveta, CHVRCHES, PVRIS, Marian Hill, Icona Pop, Junior Prom, The New Pornographers, Delta Rae, The Chainsmokers, Phoebe Ryan, Jillette Johnson, The Colourist, Little Daylight, HAIM. Avril Lavigne, Allie X, Sylvan Esso

13) Memory? The first Orchestra concert I performed in! (Although there IS another one but I’ll put it in a separate blog post.

My Savannah Field Trip nearing the end of my 8th grade year.

14) Book? The Lunar Chronicles <3!

The Perks Of Being A Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky

(It’s Kind Of A Funny Story by Ned Vizzini is rising up though)

THIS OR THAT:

15) Invisibility or Ability to fly? I would like to fly. I wouldn’t have to sit in traffic anymore or sit in the stuffy Van during road trips!

I’m already invisible so Flight.

16) Cookies or Cake? I COULD get Cookie Cake. So CAKE!

Cake lol

17) Twitter or Facebook? I don’t have any of those.

My third home is Twitter.

18) Movies or Books? Books are LIFE. 

Books are necessary for life.

19) Coke or Sprite? Can’t decide! Both!

Coke (I live where it’s made lol)

20) Blind or Deaf? Deaf you don’t have to hear crap people say to you, and there’s so much peace and QUIET.

Blind…? I need my music and there’s audiobooks.

21) Tea or Coffee? Tea, especially Peach flavored.

COFFEE!!!!!!

WHATS YOUR:

22) Age? I’m 13!

15 since a little more than a week ago.

23) Sign? I’m a Scorpio!

This wouldn’t change: Scorpio.

24) Height? 5’5 and 3/4!

5′ 7″

25) Sexuality? I’m straight… Or did you mean gender wise? Then I’m a girl.

Wtf is genderwise… Straight.

26) Shoe size? 11 in womens.

11 1/2

27) Religion? Christianity but let’s PLEASE not fight about religion here.

Agnostic (which is not Atheist)

28) Longest Relationship? I haven’t been IN one so….

N/A

OPINION ON:

29) Gay Rights? Everyone deserves happiness that’s for sure so… I guess I approve of it in some aspects but then aren’t sure again… Let’s pretend like I never answered this.

Wholeheartedly support.

30) Second Chances? Yeah, it’s perfectly human to make mistakes and to forgive.

Yes and I’m a naturally forgiving person.

31) Long Distance relationships? Haven’t had a relationship!

forever alone

32) Abortion? NEVER., you are eradicating the ability for a baby to live life by doing that.

I’m Pro-Choice. It’s their body, if they wish… let them.

33) The Death Penalty? No, EVERYONE HAS A RIGHT TO LIFE! The government shouldn’t be the ones to judge when someone should die.

I agree.

34) Drugs? No, they are harmful to us and can kill easily.

like above, hell no

35) Love? Not entirely…. The scientific concept of the five senses, chemical reactions, and the brain putting you under an illusion… it just made it some sort of lying illusion the brain created to me.

Even with the science, I suppose so.

DO YOU:

36) Believe in Ghosts? Yes and No.

Eh…. kind of?

37) Shower facing the shower head or turned away from it? I face the shower head.

It depends.

38) Sleep with the door open or closed? I sleep with it open.

Open still.

39) Love someone? Nope.

Nope.

40) Still watch cartoons? Yes!

Hell yeah.

41) Have a boyfriend/girlfriend? No.

forever alone

42) Like yourself? Yes!

lol no

Float In The Cyber Space!

Aloha

Welp, it’s been some time, hasn’t it?  Apologies for pretty much ghosting y’all, but high school does call. And god is the call loud and annoying.

My 15th birthday was a week ago and then I KNEW I had to jump back on here.

(Plus, my reader’s back up XD)

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!

I’ll fill you in on life a post later… eventually.

If anyone wants to contact me when I’m not WordPress bound:

Twitter: @therealdeals14

Tumblr: carcrasheartbreaks.tumblr.com (usually post self-made edits daily)

Email: artsmylifeandmore@yahoo.com

or even Chatzy, lol

I’m usually on Tumblr the most but I do visit the other sites daily.

Float In The Cyber Space!

Let’s Reflect.

Today, as it is obvious, is 9/11. This year marks the 15th anniversary of when several lives were permanently scarred but in all actuality, it has affected all of us: directly or indirectly.

I was on tumblr this morning (because I live on the internet) and I saw a interesting post that I want to share with you. Now, the post was removed so I’m hoping no one sent them a lot of hate but honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if it did happen. So I’ll quote it below:

“R.I.P. The 2976 American people that lost their lives on 9/11 and R.I.P. the 48,644 Afghan and 1,690,903 Iraqi and 35000 Pakistani people that paid the ultimate price for a crime they did not commit.” -arabbara

As the media mourns the deaths of the innocent lives lost during Tuesday, September 11th, 2001, they… lack to bring the attention of the raging amount of Islamophobia within this country and also the world. Islamophobia is a problem and I can’t imagine someone telling me otherwise. Period.

We can’t blame terrorist attacks on ENTIRE demographic due to the fact that someone or a group of corrupted people decisions. It’s like saying since one ice cream vendor gave you a contaminated ice cream, ALL ICE CREAM VENDORS will give you a contaminated ice cream. This a bad analogy, but no. It doesn’t work that way.

Not all Muslims are terrorists, and as a matter of fact, their religion promotes peace. It’s just the fact that people twist the words of the religion to justify their horrific actions, when in reality: Most Muslims DO NOT approve of this,

I know Muslims and should my friends be sitting inside their houses, constantly afraid for their lives because people are out to persecute them due to the actions of an individual that they most likely have to NO relation NOR support whatsoever?

No.

Float In The Memory of Cyber Space.

 

 

A High School Break Down In The Eyes Of A Senior

Maybe about a week or so ago, we had our freshman mentors come in during 4th period. They separated our class into about 6 groups and each group had their own little sector. Our group was by the door and I only knew one person in my group well enough as a friend. That was the point of splitting us up though; to make new friends and that we would get into these groups everytime they come in.

Now our group leader was a tall girl with glasses, and let’s call her Assai. She was a senior and she seemed pretty nice as she was asking us questions about what club we wanted to join and how our experiences were. I think she noticed the fact none of us were really speaking to each other and just allowed questions to be asked.

So this one guy, let’s call him Avec, asks, “What would be your breakdown of high school grade by grade?”

She thought it over some, before she responded, “Well, it kind of goes like this:

It’s your freshman year, la di da la la. New school, new friends, maybe a new you? You kind of don’t know what you’re doing, just winging it. There might be a little tension between the people from different schools but I mean you live with it. By the end, you still are slightly uneasy.

Sophomore year. It gets a little tougher in academics and maintaining relationships with people but it’ll be fine. You start to just not care who came from where. You’re learning your way and probably making a name for yourself by this time. You do get more relaxed and think, “Huh, maybe this isn’t so bad. What was I worried about as a freshmeat?”

Junior year, it slaps you in the face with drama and problems and it slaps you hard. Suddenly, you don’t know what you’re doing and you’ve never been so lost. I know it sounds cliche but it’s true. Things you never knew arise and friends can become strangers quickly. Without a strong support group you will most likely fall victim to the machine of life that will chew you up and spit you out.

Then Senior year: You are either a) in a bubble and haven’t exposed yourself to anything, b) gone, c) numb and want life to get on or d) shaking and rocking back and forth, horrified.”

“Which one are you?” This girl, calling her Alla, asked.

“The one shaking and rocking back and forth, horrified.” She spoke seriously.

We all looked at each other like, “What the hell happened for you?”

And then she clasped her hands and continued like she hadn’t scared us all: “So the Inside Scoop is on Thursday and I really do hope you join one club because they really are fun!”

I’m not going to lie, I was kind of.. bothered after that.

(Note: Over the past month, my reader was been very problematic: it only gives me bit and pieces of posts, won’t show images, or just doesn’t load at all which is why i haven’t exactly been able to read posts. If there are ANY posts you want me to read/ tags you want me to do, link them below and I’ll make my best effort to read them.)

Float In The Cyber Space!